Greatest new dog name: "Fiscal Cliffy"

Wanna blow a teller's mind? Make a deposit into your savings account.

I wrap all my unpaid bills in lottery tickets hoping each will get the hint.

The ultimate addition of insult to injury: You're broke as hell but still vote Republican. 

My glass is always half full. Of what, I will not say.

Dude, do you know how many donuts you could've bought instead of all those lottery tickets?!

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

$250k Middle Class? I must be in Upper Poverty! (idea courtesy of Mitt Romney)

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

Latest thing to become obsolete: The great American job resume.

Life is full of paradoxes: While I do sunscreen the cat, I often forget to use it on myself.

We're running out of thin ice to skate on. 

I diligently used my GPS and still ended up in the wrong state.

Good news: I found a $20-dollar while riding my bike. Bad news: I inhaled it.
 
© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

I'm the only person in town with a lizard tail collection.

Astrophysicists make better lovers.

Come ride the brand-new Mount Everest Sherpa Tram!

Parked cars get the best mileage.

Don't cave to conspiracy theorists: We'll never run out of oil or water.

Worrying over things you can't control is still worth it.

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

Like cockroaches, politicians will be the last humans standing when the world ends.

"Somewhere over the Bainbow..."

Genmoditarian: A person who only eats genetically modified foods.

When the TSA requires on-site colonoscopies, I'm done flying.

Resurrect FDR

Contrarian Humanitarian: I run a no-kill shelter for mice.  

Birth control unfairly limits the chances of ever reaching 1 trillion people.

The epitome of redundancy: "Lying Politician"

People get along better when they're heavily armed.

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

How many gigs of storage does the average brain have?

You're always on camera. And yes, it could always go viral.

Biggest losers in the Digital Age: USPS and the pen industry.

Lance Armstrong didn't dope and I'm not overweight.

I try to exercise at least once a month.

"A trip to the dump clears the mind." -Norton Glossnagle

My school didn't have computers. They had these weird things called "books."

Can't we all just get along be Canadian?

Your Brain: The ultimate external hard drive.

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.

The biggest problem with Man is simply that he is human.

Don't you just love a good lard-infused extravaganza?

I'll quit whining when you quit yodeling.

Bound for Mexico to pursue employment.

Just quit my job (which was looking for a job).

© 2012 by Grant William Brad Gerver. All Rights Reserved. If you care to reproduce any of these as bumper stickers or for any other project, I am very open to working with you: seriouskidding@gmail.com ) ---- "Blues Lunatic~Idiot Stick Videos": Tons of original acoustic blues, rock, folk tunes, protest songs, off-the-wall humor & Shih Tzus. 271 videos & counting. Filibi.com : Find It, Love It, Buy It.